Where have I been?


I’ve been on my ups and downs. Trying to figure out what’s worth doing, what is needed, what’s important enough in order to maintain inner peace. Inner peace equals a better life, to love. This struggle happens know and then, when priorities need to be done, scheduled and then change them for unexpected reasons. One of those is my writing. Lately, I have been working on my fantasy book. The idea hunts my chaotic brain that this is not my calling and yet it hurts to think it is not. This is all part of the creative life, I think. Does it happen to you?

Every time I make the decision to call it quits, a small thing happens. Either an email, a tiny interest of someone else, a thought…

To think of quitting is to think you are not good. That life and the people around you show no interest at all in your craft. That time is not meant to be spend on typing words, in developing stories. All of these takes away that time needed for other things in life.

The joy that once was there is no longer, replaced by a sorrow that like a entity haunts you constantly. Unbearable, it hits so hard it feels like the sting of a whip in your bare back. It hurts that much.

Do you hurt when you think of quitting?

Perhaps.

I have made some decisions based on current and past events in my life. One will take me years to fulfill, and the end result will not be for the better of some. Either way it will be for me and in the end is my happiness that is important.  For this passion of mine called writing, I have given myself a year to fulfill the goals I have set for myself. My clock starts know!

This fantasy book I am working on, Ascensión Divina, of which you can read a sample chapter located in the upper menu of this blog of the same title (brace yourself it is in Spanish! So visit google transalate), I’ve been revising it, yet again.

What has changed in it? Lots! Well, a few things here and there. I am still deciding if a prologue of explanations is needed for this story. I do not like does explanation prologues that you just can skip and move to the story. What I wrote, and not yet convinced with it, is a story with characters that do not appear in the rest of the book, but that will give you an idea of who is who and where did they come from.

In the first chapter, I have changed the name for one of my Point-of-View characters, there are three in this first part of the series. I have been using her title, Arakoel, and a few people that read it got confused thinking it was her name. Iyeguá is her name and will be used and an explanation of who she is to her race as arakoel, which is the female title of those who rule the nation, sets aside any confusion. Took a mighty heavy scene out that the chapter could do with out and now it flows. Of course, changed the beginning and put it else where and started with a scene of the past that is a climatic moment for Iyeguá.

Today I will embrace the future changes of chapter two that it’s Iyeguá’s and read it very carefully, for it introduces the other POVs and many secondary and third characters in the story.

Know I leave you to read some pages of The Dragonbone Chair, and take care of my little one that fell in school and had to have stitches in his chin. Did I mentioned I have not cook dinner yet. I do it early in order to have time to do homework in tranquility with my kids.

Until next time, my friend and be inspire.

A.R. Román

2 thoughts on “Where have I been?

  1. In a class I learned this: you write. You write because you want to, have to and it fulfills you. You write and here is the important thing: write without needing to be propped up by cheerleaders. Some will love it, some will hate it, some will support it, some will not. You write for YOU and no one else. If you want to write, WRITE! Many good books were written in-between other jobs and without anyone believing in the story or the writer. So what? You do this for YOU and YOU are a writer, my friend. I know this. Do not give up on your dream. Keep writing. The world would be incomplete without your voice.

    1. Love you, Nan. I am too hard with myself must of the time and put pressure to push me forward. Thank you for your words. And I am working hard to erradicate the feelings and telling myself it is for ME.

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